Kimberley Woods bravely shares her journey with melancholy: ‘Fortunately, I am not self-harming anymore’

She remembers being captivated by an outdated videotape, which confirmed her aunt successful the silver medal on the Junior World Championships a yr earlier than she was born. “It wasn’t even the Olympics, it was simply the Junior World Championships,” she laughs. “However I beloved it… I used to be simply in awe of what the game was.” Then and there, she grew to become decided to have her personal second on the rostrum. “I mentioned, ‘I need to try this. I need to go and beat her.’ I used to be actually aggressive.”

Her grandparents warned her that she would wish to have the ability to swim 50 metres – so off she went to swimming classes. Earlier than lengthy, she got here again with a swimming badge, and her classes started.

For the primary few years, her grandfather served as her coach. “He was within the swimming pool with me, educating me the best way to roll and do the fundamentals.” Ultimately, he took her to her first race. “It in all probability took me a really very long time to do the course, however I used to be actually completely happy that I might achieved it. I got here again with a bit of trophy,” she says, including proudly, ‘I used to be the one woman competing in that race.”

For the younger Woods, the game quickly grew to become an outlet – an escape from what was changing into an more and more disagreeable expertise at college. “I wasn’t an enormous fan of college,” she says. As she received higher and stronger and braver in a kayak, her classmates grew to become increasingly more merciless. “My physique modified. I began getting stronger, getting muscle tissue in my arms, getting a little bit of a six-pack,” she says. “Going by way of all that as a lady is totally different – I feel it’s kind of extra accepted these days, but it surely undoubtedly wasn’t again then.”

Hopping into her boat grew to become her “solely solution to launch the vitality that I had.” She provides, “I did not know the best way to course of my feelings. I wasn’t very clever when it got here to that facet of issues.” For some time, Woods was in a position to handle her psychological well being by throwing herself into the game. However then, in 2015, all of it modified. “It labored till the game was taken away from me.”

Whereas taking part in American soccer at college, Woods ruptured her ACL. The damage led to a critical operation and a prolonged restoration. “I did not know the best way to cope with it,” she confesses. “I type of had this persona the place I used to be actually sturdy – I had put up this type of picture the place I used to be by no means weak.”

With no outlet left, trapped in her scholar flat, Woods started self-harming. “It type of grew to become a little bit of a routine, in order that I may really feel one thing. That was the outlet,” says Woods.

Ultimately, her coach seen what was taking place and approached her. “Fortunately, he did,” she says. “He was one of the best individual to do it.” She started the lengthy highway to restoration, seeing therapists, psychologists and doing two stints on the Priory, a psychological well being therapy centre. “I’m very grateful that every one of that has made me who I’m as we speak. And fortunately, I am not self-harming anymore.”